We talked about his scam, and Bill said something that stuck with me. This fascinated me — it seemed his loneliness overrode his common sense. Even as Bill and I spoke about the detrimental effects of scams, I was pretty sure he was still sending money overseas. Not long after, I moved to New York with my boyfriend, Michael. Michael went to work in an office and made new friends, while I stayed home and researched scams.
I had my guinea pig scammer. In customized curly rainbow font, Cindy asked what the weather was like in Mumbai, which made me realize she had her wires crossed between me and someone else she was scamming. I decided there was no need to correct her, for now, so I Googled the weather in Mumbai. Cindy sent a photo: So whenever I communicated with Cindy, I pictured the woman leaning on the car.
According to her, we were dating. So while my boyfriend was at work, my Senegalese girlfriend and I watched soccer and chatted online. This was a problem, as she still thought I was a middle-aged Indian man. I decided to come clean. I found this simultaneously funny, confusing and endearing. She asked for a photo, and, slightly baffled by this turn of events, against all reason, I sent one.
Cindy asked me to call. I wondered if she was lying. Does she have a partner, I thought, or is she a single parent? And there it was: Cindy was no longer a random email in my spam folder. She was a person on the other end of the line, asking for help.
Instead, I beat around the bush like a coward. I thought. Right on cue, an email came from Cindy. I do not go out to sell my body like some other girls do here. I knew scammers rarely got arrested; it was a relatively safe crime. If one of the other options was sex work, I could see that chatting to amorous westerners on the internet would be more appealing. Could I blame her for what she was doing? I felt like a jerk for stringing her along. I decided to write an email, from the real me, to the real Cindy.
I intended to tell her a bit about me, but I found myself telling her a lot. I told her my family came to Australia when the war in Yugoslavia began, and that my dad died when I was a child. See also The Fully Automated Love Life of Henry Keanridge about a programmer who made juggling multiple relationships a little easier. This was almost half a century ago.
Please see: Fools for love: Online dating firm denies creating profiles to tempt clients http: In this version of the ploy, the women are real but most of them are scamming the guys themselves. Brian are you able to email the list, it would be handy for the guys on eater to see if any of there emails have been blacklisted as such. Of course, scammers show up there as well, so I just pay attention and set realistic expectations going in. It may not be, there might really be a 35 year old interested in me, but I seriously doubt it. One thing I do is to try to set up phone contact and a first date just as quickly as possible.
And of course the first date should be something relatively quick and inexpensive, like coffee or lunch.
Not only does that eliminate the scammers in a hurry, but it also tells me just how interested a real woman might be. YMMV, as they say. I think awareness and standard operating procedures, combined with realistic expectations, will go a long way in making an online dating experience safer and more successful.
As Cyber Jay pointed out below, what are the chances that some beautiful young thing would be interested in someone of that demographic and contact them online? About as likely as a guy in that demographic walking into a bar and having a gorgeous something hit on him out of the blue.
Rather than belittling my response, maybe you can offer up something helpful instead. People pay untold amounts of money just to see women showing off on stage all over the world. The advice is: That is atleast for the ones that are not CGI. As a part of the human condition, we all have a need for the touch of another person. So much so that we will believe anything.
This includes the lies we are told through email, social network websites, and the ads from that backs of magazines. Ya know, if everyone would just lighten up a little and just start loving someone….. Here is my suggestion for a dating site, especially if you are in a city of more than , Turn the computer off and look the local outing, hiking, bicycling, mountaineering, dancing, whatever club and go there.
I find those places offer the least scam and scammers. The outdoors clubs have members who are into fitness and therefore in good shape. Many sedentary job holders are lumpy.
Krebs on Security
So that is a good suggestion. And that buys you access to a typically smallish couple of dozen people, tops potential dating pool that will quickly be exhausted, in all likelihood. The fact that anyone actually falls for that kind of fake profile to me is astounding in this day and age. If you are that desperate that you think these woman and their stories are real stranded at the airport etc you probably deserve being scammed.
Good Grief! What exactly is it that surprises you? No one cares to know. People are so absorbed in their smartphone that they will walk into parked vehicles and drive off cliffs to their own deaths. Ya know, for the longest time, people worried about computer viruses from porn sites without ever understand that the porn is only the lure used to bring users to the site….. But, no one even cares about any of that any more. This article refers to men, but I work at a FI and I can tell you I see more women falling for these types of scams then men.
They like to text back and forth, wire out money, etc.
Last Fall, I assisted a female friend in navigating the sketchy online dating waters and was shocked to see some of the more reputable dating sites to be littered with scammers of all flavors. Unknowing military members that honorably serve were being hijacked from their social media outlets—primarily Facebook.
Dating Online: Real Love | Scam Detector
Open or Public Facebook profiles and photos are serving as excellent resources for scammers to harvest a bounty of useful information. Photos with their military uniforms and nametags and family pictures are stolen and dating accounts created that left no reason for anyone to believe that these guys and gals were not legit. Even the casual correspondence and messaging taking place was grammatically correct with little error, which would normally garner some suspicion of a scam and set the red flag warning.
Personal photos stolen from social media continue to be exchanged between the target and scammer, creating the trust and bond between the two and tugging at whatever vulnerable heart strings they could. In some cases, the scammers are even setting up bogus Facebook accounts with pictures in order to legitimize their existence and place the target at ease.
In some cases, the scammer was even willing to send a photo of themselves holding a sign displaying anything that the target wanted—and as you mentioned in your article the wonders of Photoshop kick into gear and provides more non-repudiation to the target. And now you know what comes next…the final stage. The criminal call center initiates the long-awaited phone correspondence in perfect English from a caller ID block to the target in order to solidify the hopeful relationship and eventual meeting place. However, there is a catch.
The scammer conveniently has all the wire transfer information handy for the target and says they are standing by to verify the transfer and, of course, never to be heard from again.