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Typically the French reserve their smiles for close friends and special occasions, like birthdays. This is not to say that the French don't like flirting.

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They live for it! The French, men and women alike, are constantly cruising in the street, on the metro, at the grocery store, and in practically every other forum of public life. If you participate in this national practice, remember not to smile and only to look; in France, flirting is done with the eyes, not the mouth.


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Cruising draguer, which literally means "dredging" in France is conducted with reckless abandon. A discreet look of admiration is always appreciated, and sometimes reciprocated. If someone returns your look with keen interest, on the street or at the florist's, it is perfectly acceptable to invite that person to have a cup of coffee with you. Many French romances begin this way. F or gays and straights alike, the street is sometimes a better place to meet people than bars or cafes.

Gay bars in France are a relatively new concept, and the idea of meeting people in bars is an American import that has yet to catch on fully.

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Not so long ago, gay bars in Paris seemed dominated at least on a decibel level by Americans, with the Frenchmen often lurking silently around the edges. Fortunately this is changing, especially in the Marais, where new bars open all the time. In general, the French do not easily strike up conversations with strangers.

Making eye contact is a good start, but more pitfalls lie ahead. French conversation is based on wit rather than substance, often resembling a kind of verbal tennis match.

I'm a gay French man looking for love – but app users just want sex

Speaking in English can actually be an advantage here assuming your new friend speaks it , since the code may be less rigid. Nevertheless, undue enthusiasm, volume or personal anecdotes can easily drive your new friend away. The French aversion to meeting and conversing with new people helps explain the popularity of sleazier venues -- cruising areas, saunas, dark rooms and sex clubs -- where the intercourse is sexual rather than social.

In these types of places post-coital conversation is the norm, if words are exchanged at all.

I'm a gay French man looking for love – but app users just want sex | Life and style | The Guardian

Always remember to be extremely careful in your sexual encounters, as France has one of Europe's highest incidences of HIV infection. B e careful, too, of the French Mediterranean? They like to think of themselves as passionate lovers, and it is quite common -- sometimes expected -- to make insincere declarations of love while in the throes of ecstasy.

If you don't reciprocate, you may be accused of heartlessness, but don't worry: And if a romance really does blossom, don't forget the new civil union laws PACS , which permit foreigners to stay in France in the name of love -- though only after dealing with the complexities and frustrations of the massive French bureaucracy.


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